The Queen and I
by ThatOneChickWhoWritesAlot
Summary: MOVIE Its been years since Leslie died yet Jess still even refuses to think her name. Now in high school, Jess goes through life day by day just to get by and still visits his kingdom when he needs to think. Yet someone wont let him forget to love.
1. Pixy Eyes

**Hello! This is my first BtT fanfic so I hope everyone enjoys it! I do not own BtT but I do own anything that doesn't seem familiar. Okay all, here's the story! Oh and this is based on the movie, I haven't read the book yet but I plan to… As soon as I find some cash. Yes I could get it from the library but I'd much rather own it.**

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The sun beat down heavily on what looked like an ancient truck in an almost abandoned parking lot. Inside the fifty something year old truck sat a seventeen year old Jess Aarons. His music was blasting to the point that he was surprised he hadn't lost his hearing and he had his head against the wheel contemplating the day before him.

Senior. The word didn't seem to fit him. He still felt like he was only eleven years old, like the day _she_ died was the day he stopped growing. The day _she_ died he became an adult in seconds flat. After that, he hadn't really aged.

Suddenly he lifted his head up and laughed. He was still refusing to use her name even mentally. Like not saying preserved her just as she was the last time he saw her. He felt guilty but the day he and his parents had gone to pay respect to the Burkes, he had taken a picture of her. What, they got to keep PT. It seemed fair to him.

He would wake up in the middle of the night even now and pull the picture out from under his pillow, a nightmare of forgetting even one small detail of her face pulling him back into reality. The color of her hair, the shape of her eyes, everything would come back to him in a second with just one glance of that picture.

Except her voice. That had seemed to die away a long time ago. He could remember the exact second he forgot that wind chime voice. He was in Terabithia, sitting in the castle they had built together drawing a picture of _her_. But this was different than the other thousand he had drawn, this is how she would have been. How she should have been.

He smiled at his work. Jess hadn't thought it possible but she was even more beautiful than he could have imagined. Her big pixy eyes smiled back at him with approval. But he decided to ask anyway.

"So," He started. "you like it?" The wind chimes over head picked up and he smiled. She seemed to really like it.

Jess looked back down at the picture and tried to imagine her really thanking him. She was sitting over on one of the boxes they had piled around the tiny room still posing with PT for their picture. She would sit him down and walk over to inspect Jess' work and a huge smile would brighten up her face.

She would open her mouth and her musical voice would find its way to his ears as she stood behind him… Her voice.

Jess tightened his eyes and focused harder. It was gone. He had replaced her wonderful voice with wishful thinking. His hoping that she was still alive and growing with him and pushed out the one thing he held dear.

His heart dropped with the memory, almost like he had failed her yet again. Jess once again lifted his head from the wheel of his truck and glanced around the parking lot. The entire section he sat in was now full and people started pouring in around him slowly making the trek from their cars to the high school before them.

After a few more moments Jess finally slid out of the truck and put her picture in his pocket then stuffed some books into his backpack. If he needed anything he'd get it at lunch or when he saw Ms. Edmunds for music class. No, she wasn't Ms. Edmunds anymore.

"Ms. Baker." He corrected himself aloud. She would still let him call her Ms. Edmunds but it had started shifting to a first name basis. Jess was the only person aloud to call her Katie from ninth grade on.

Jess sighed, this year would be no different. He pushed open the door to the huge building and made his way through the halls attempting to find his home room. The only thing that kept his grades up, that kept him going in life was her memory. The last time he saw her drenched from the pouring rain holding PT and smiling at him. He always thought of her walking away back to her house, but everyday he'd follow her.

Only he could see the rain in the halls, only he could hear her laugh. He followed the phantom memory right up to the correct door of his home room.

"One thing down, four classes to go." Jess growled as he took a seat in the back. Janice Avery smiled at him and waved as he unwillingly waved back. He and Janice had become friends, not close friends but good enough to keep him out of therapy he assumed. She had grown into herself since their childhood and she now was a nice and beautiful person.

Janice had become popular in her own respect and still talked to Jess. He would talk to her friends but no one ever really clicked with him. His sisters were all he really had in life that could be considered true friends.

Jess placed his head on the desk and tried to think about anything other than _her_. This was a difficult task but he was going to try, it never hurts to try. Math. He'd think of math and how much he sucks at it.

_That works._ He thought. _Better than most things I usually think up._

So he thought of how much he was going to dread math class. How he would start drawing on the sides of tests and papers only to stop himself when he realized his head was once again "in the clouds".

The bell sounded and he took the paper the teacher had placed on his desk with all his classes on it out the door. First off was English, then math, music class, and Chemistry. Joy.

So Jess made his way into a Miss. Jackson's English class. She was a tiny twenty something woman starting out with her first real class. Anytime someone would walk through the door, she would jump slightly and attack them with kindness. Jess instantly hated her.

He felt bad for disliking her but if he was going to have to deal with such perkiness at this time of morning then it seemed fair. The high school wasn't big, just like all the other schools and word spread fast over the years. All the teachers would read his name, give him that same pity look and always pay special attention to him throughout the year. He would hate it.

The same thing would happen when a new student would be introduced to the class, but this time it was Jess jumping. He would always dream that she would walk through he door and laugh at him for worrying about her for so long. She'd tell him she was noting to worry over and playfully tap him on the shoulder. But it never happened. Why would it?

The class filed in and books were passed out at the sound of the bell. Boys flirted with girls and the girls would groan and scoot away. Jess just did what he always did, focus on his work. Eventually everyone was lost in papers and reading assignments that they didn't notice the door to the class room open.

The guidance councilor slid in and walked over to Miss. Jackson. Mr. Smith whispered something to the English teacher who simply nodded and smiled.

_Oh god_, Jess thought, _another victim was making their way into this happy hell_.

"Class!" Miss. Jackson perked up. "We have a new student!" She glanced around the room with a massive smile.

A small red head girl slid into the room and lifted her head. Jess' heart stopped. She looked just like _her_. The girl had long red hair down to her waste with braids randomly placed throughout it, huge blue pixy like eyes and doll like skin. Jess was going to vomit.

"Hello." She squeaked. That voice. The memory of the voice long forgotten broke through the box Jess had accidentally locked it away in and flooded his mind. She opened her mouth again. "I'm Macy Summers, nice to meet you."

She smiled as the teacher directed her to the desk next to Jess' and he messenger bag jingled as each bobble hit her leg. She had a zip up sweat shirt on with a skirt and bright orange tights. Filthy white Converse finished off Jess nightmare.

She took a seat next to him and smiled. "Hi, nice to meet you. What's your name?"

She waited, Jess on the other hand fainted.

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**So that's chapter one! I would love reviews and feed back on this. I think the main reason I'm going to make it Teen is because of cursing or something… Just to be safe. Thanks and see you later!**


	2. In Dreams

**Yes! Thanks for the reviews, well here's the update! Once again I don't own anything to do with BtT but I do own things you don't know such as Macy.**

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The next time Jess opened his eyes, to his surprise he was in Terabithia. He was still the same age, still in the same clothes that he had been wearing in school but there he sat in the tree house.

"Okay, this is a delusion from hitting my head on the desk when I fainted. That's gotta be it." Jess wanted to believe himself but he wasn't so sure. He could feel the wind blowing his hair, he could hear the birds in the trees and smell the forest around him. Something wasn't adding up. Then he felt it.

A small warm hand found its way around his arm and held on tight. Jess jumped and spun around. For the second time that day he felt like he was going to faint. There she stood just as he remembered her. She was smaller of course but then again he was bigger than before.

Her huge eyes studied him and the wind whipped her blonde hair around her face. Jess couldn't hold the tears back any longer and collapsed to his knees.

"I can't believe it…" He sobbed as he buried his face in her hair. "Your alive!"

She had to be he concluded, he could feel her small frame locked up in his arms and smell her strawberry shampoo.

"No Jess…" She whispered in his ear and he could feel tears mixing with his own as they ran down his face. "I'm not, your just… Visiting."

"Visiting?" Jess pulled his face back as she nodded at him.

"This is... Well I guess you'd call it my heaven. It sort of intertwines with other peoples in the parts that we have in common. We can be anywhere and do anything, so I decided to stay and protect Terabithia." She smiled at him but his heart sank.

"Am I dead? I couldn't have hit my head that hard right?" His happiness flooded out of him and was replaced with worry. Who would take care of May Bell and the others? Their parents were getting older and it was getting more difficult for them to take care of everyone.

She just laughed. "No silly! I said your _visiting_! I'm here to talk to you about your life!"

Jess sat down and she quickly took her place in his lap. To Jess' surprise he blushed a little. _I'm a pedophile…_ He thought as he shook his head.

"What's wrong with my life? Its not so bad." Other than Les… Other than her not being there anymore, life was actually okay. He may not have real friends but he did have health and his family was always there for him. It wasn't so bad. What else did he need?

"Jess! You've never been in love! How can you say your life's ok!?" She jumped up and looked him in the eyes.

"Love? Of course I have!" Jess jumped up too and remembered that he now towered over her.

She sighed and blushed slightly. "Other than me?"

Jess just stood there for a second letting time go on without him. "No." He answered flatly. "There was no other you, no one else matters."

Gently she pushed him back down and sat back in his lap. "Jess… You get to live. I don't. I'm always going to be ten, I'm never getting older. You have to live for me. Fall in love, travel, go to college, get married and have little Jess'!"

"But I don't want to." He finally admitted the truth to himself. "I don't see the point in living in a world where your not. When you died part of me died too. Nothing can fix that."

"Jess, I'd love to be your one and only queen forever but you know that can't happen. I'm the dead one, not you. You can't just give up on life and wait to die. I don't want you to. So even if you don't want to, please keep going for me." She squeezed his hand and gave him a hopeful glance.

"But… Its not fair. Your dead because I was selfish and wanted to be alone with Katie… If it weren't for me…" He was going to continue but was cut off when she pressed her lips to his.

"Jess, it was my time to go. I know you've been blaming yourself, I know you don't think you deserve happiness but I know you do. You are the best person I ever met and I want nothing but the best for you."

He didn't say anything, he just let her talk. This time he wouldn't forget her voice.

"I love you Jess and I know you love me but I'm not your only queen. You have to find her, the new queen and take care of her just like you would me… Do you understand?"

Jess hesitated but shook his head yes. He would try, not because he wanted to but because he didn't want to hurt her anymore than she was already.

She smiled bigger than before. "Thank you Jess." She hugged him tighter than before, a hug goodbye. "I'll be watching you."

"Wait! Les…Leslie don't go!" For the first time in years he had spoken her name. It burned his mouth and made his body tingle but it felt good. She was still in his mind just as perfect as before but the girl before him was fading away fast.

"Jess please, for me live. Do whatever it takes but just live! I've sent someone… I hope she's good enough."

In a second she was gone. Leslie Burke was gone all over again and Jess felt cold. Instead of the sounds and smells of the forest, he heard the buzzing of lights and the smell of medicine.

He shifted, he wasn't sitting anymore but lying down. Reluctantly he opened his eyes.

The room around him was bright white and for a second he was convinced he had really died. Yet when his eyes finally adjusted he realized he was in the nurse's office at school. He still wanted to vomit but couldn't remember why. Why had he fainted in the first place? Then he heard it.

"Oh thank goodness your alright!" _Leslie?! _He jumped up and turned his head but there wasn't a blonde ten year old staring back at him, rather a red headed seventeen year old.

Macy Summers looked like she was about to cry. Her huge blue eyes were rimmed with tears and she was shaking slightly. "I thought you had a heart attack or something! All I did was say hello and you passed out…" Her voice faded as she looked at her lap.

No it wasn't Leslie but she sure could pass for her. Her looks were almost dead on other than a few minor differences. The hair was the most outstanding difference but there were also freckles on her porcine skin and her nails were longer than Leslie's. Jess watched as rainbow colored fingers dug into pink palms.

"I'm really sorry… I don't know what I did but I really am. I'll make you cookies if it'll help." Cookies? He could have died and she was offering cookies?

"Its alright… It wasn't you its me." Jess grunted out and avoided making eye contact with her. Apparently this isn't what Macy wanted.

Next thing he knew she was on the bed and in his face. "But I want to make it up to you! You were just fine before I came in class and I want to make it alright again!"

Jess couldn't believe this girl, she was completely insane. But he found himself blushing anyway. Why'd she have to look so much like Leslie?

"No really!" He rolled away and she jumped back into her chair. "Its alright!"

"Sorry, I don't take no for an answer. I'm going to do whatever it takes to make this right again and you'll just have to accept that!" Macy shook her arms with every word just to prove her point.

"Alright." Jess laughed slightly. "I'll try my best to let you make this up to me… Whatever this is…"

Macy was apparently satisfied. As she obviously became less tense and a smile fell across her face.

"So lets start over." She held out her hand towards Jess. "I'm Macy Summers, and you are?"

Jess just looked at her rainbow finger tips again before he held out his hand in response. "Jess… I'm Jess Aarons."

"Well nice to meet you Mr. Aarons! I hope we can become friends." Again she smiled and again Jess thought his heart would break. This wasn't going to be easy.

_Wait a minute… _A thought struck Jess. _Alright so Leslie is apparently my guardian angel, and she sent someone for me…So does that mean?_

"Macy?" Jess lifted himself up and tossed the covers off. She looked over at him and tilted her head. "Why did you move here?"

"To tell the truth I'm not totally sure… My father got a job offer here out of the blue and my parents didn't want to live in the city anymore so here we are. Its funny because my dad was almost sure he was going to lose his job with all the new people they've hired. Funny how things work out huh?"

"Yeah." Jess looked out the window and for a brief second thought he saw one of the Terabithian fairies hovering outside the ledge. "Real funny."

"So what class do you have next? It's the end of the day, so home right?" Macy grabbed her bags and Jess' much to his protest.

"Wait. I've been out that long?" Jess' heart jumped, he couldn't really have been right?

"Yeah… The nurse almost called your parents. But the music teacher came down here for a little to vouch as a guardian. After that I came back and I've been here ever since."

"God, I better get my work from all my teachers I guess." Jess shook hung his head.

"Oh I already got that for you." Macy held up a folder with a random assortment of papers in it. "It was in your backpack so while you were out I went around getting your work. I thought I should get started on my making-it-up-to-you business."

"Thanks…" Jess took the folder slowly as the bell sounded off in the hall. "Hey Macy? You want a ride home?"

He thought he could feel the flutter of little fairy wings close by but he could have been wrong, he thought he could hear that wind chime laugh pick up with delight. Then again, he'd been wrong before.

Macy's eyes grew even bigger, which Jess didn't think was possible, as she quickly nodded her head yes.

"I live kinda far from here though… Kinda in the boonies actually." She shifted the weight of the bags on her back as they walked to Jess' truck.

Jess just laughed. "That's alright, I do too. What street?"

Macy smiled. "Its really pretty. A big white house with a gold living room on Oak Street!"

Jess stopped dead in his tracks, his hand inches from the door handle of his truck. The wind picked up and flowed through his opened window rattling the keys he had hanging from the rear view mirror.

He could have sworn he heard Leslie laughing from over head, amused at what she had started. _Leslie_, Jess looked up towards the sky, _you have a sick sense of humor. _

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**Well, there's chapter two! Reviews and feedback would be very much appreciated. Thanks for reading, until next time… See ya.**


	3. Midnight Walks

**Well thanks for the reviews! What? Some is better than none. Anyway, here's the update! I don't own BtT, as is obvious by now… I would hope.**

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Macy got worried again. Jess was blankly staring at the door handle, then up at the sky like someone called his name. But they were standing in a near empty parking lot with nothing but cars driving past with screaming teenagers in them. Maybe he thought he had heard his name but no one drives flying cars…

"Jess… You alright?" She asked as she placed their bags on the truck bed with a thud. It seemed to snap him right back because he spun his head around to face her worried eyes.

"Yeah." He stuttered. "Just fine, thought I saw a spider." He gave her a false smile yet it calmed her down a little.

"Should we be going then?" Jess gestured to the other side of the truck as Macy nodded.

The ride home was quite, too quite for Macy's liking but she had an itching feeling Jess' mind was elsewhere. Like he was thinking of something or someone.

Macy was sure she reminded him of this someone, she was positive of it. Every time Jess would look at her, he wasn't really looking at her. It was like he was looking past her to someone else, like they were always right behind her but she never could see them.

She didn't like. Anytime Jess looked at her it was like all of his emotions exploded at once. There was hurt and anger, sadness and something else… Something that didn't seem to fit just right. For a few seconds, anytime he looked at her, it was lovingly. And that scared her the most.

_This person must be very important to him._ She concluded as they pulled into the elementary and middle school parking lot where two little girls came running up to the side of the truck. _I wonder what happened to them…_

"Jess your late!" The slightly taller girl yelled out. She had long brown hair that was pulled back out of her face sloppily into a hair tie, she looked about eleven or twelve. "We've been waiting forever!"

"May Bell just get in the back, it hasn't been forever so don't try and pull that. I'm… Ten minutes late. That's all." Jess said while rubbing his temples. Macy then looked at the smaller girl.

"Who's this Jess? She's pretty!" The smaller girl had her pulled into two braids that were slowly falling out of their place. A giant smile broke across her lips when Macy opened the door.

"Hello sweetie, I'm Macy. What's your name?" Macy bowed slightly to the smaller girl as May Bell laughed.

"My name is Joyce Ann Aarons!" She bowed back. "Very nice to meet you Macy!"

Macy laughed and picked Joyce Ann up then gently placed her in the back next to May Bell. "You two hold on tight alright? We don't want anything happening to you!"

Both girls nodded their heads and settled themselves down in the back. They surrounded themselves with the book bags and made a little wall to keep them safe. Jess sighed, this was not helping his growing head ache.

Macy got back in the cab of the truck and gently closed the door. "Sorry, I love little kids." She gave him a sheepish smile.

Jess just shook his head. "Its alright, they are cute." With that Jess started up the truck again and off they went.

The further down the road they went, the fewer cars and houses they saw until there was nothing but empty fields. Jess had the land memorized like Leslie's picture in his back pocket, nothing could throw him off no matter how big a change as long as there was still some small similarity to the land.

He turned down the road that lead to his house and Macy's and stopped the truck. May Bell stood up in the back and jumped out.

"Jess what are you doing? Don't you have to take Macy home?" May Bell crossed her arms and glared at her older brother.

"I am, you two have to walk the rest of the way. Macy lives over there." He leaned out the window and pointed over to Leslie's old house. May Bell understood instantly.

"Oh okay. Joyce Ann! Come on! We'll walk the rest of the way okay? I'll play Barbie's with you when we get home." May Bell said as she made her way to the back of the truck. At first Joyce Ann hesitated but quickly followed her older sister. She had been told about her brother's friend who died and she knew not to talk about the house in front of him.

"Okay. Bye Jess! I love you and I'll see you later!" The little girl threw her bag down out of the truck and jumped down to follow it. She waved as she and May Bell started walking down shadow covered path to their home.

"Jess, you didn't have to do that. My house is right there!" Macy pointed as Jess slowly pulled up into the driveway. Macy could see the color draining from his face the closer they got to the building. She was worried but didn't want to say anything, she didn't want to make it worse.

"Well I thought I'd make it up to you for scaring you earlier… I scared you when I fainted and I feel pretty bad." Jess looked up into one of the windows. It was Leslie's bedroom. He could remember from waking her up one morning by calling her name out until she answered.

Macy smiled and his stomach sank again. "Its alright, I'm supposed to be making this up to you!" She tried to ignore that face again, the someone else face but it still looked back at her with sadness and caring. "Do you wanna come in? I made cookies last night with Mom."

"That's okay." This was as close as Jess could get without breaking down. He couldn't set foot in that house for a while… He'd have to get used to it all over again. Especially that living room… He could still remember watching Leslie dancing around the room as it lit up with the setting sun…

"You sure?" Macy's voice snapped him out of it. "Its not like it's late or anything."

Jess shifted nervously. "No, I need to get home and help with chores. I'll see you tomorrow though." He smiled and she nodded her head. " I could pick you up tomorrow morning too if you'd like."

"I'd like that." Macy smiled again but this time at the house. "Its such a pretty house, don't you think?"

Jess just looked at his steering wheel again. He could feel the tears burning their way back up all over again. "Yeah, its beautiful."

He could hear the door to the truck open as Macy slid out and walked around back to grab her bag. He only looked up when he saw her walking away. It was scary how much it hurt to watch her. There was something else there, making its way up from the deepest part of his mind and slowly leaking out. He thought he'd never feel it again, but he wasn't sure if it was truly it.

Along with the pain he could feel the butterflies making their way around his stomach and it made him nervous. Jess watched as she opened the door to the house and waved him goodbye. He waved back, knowing from today on his life wasn't getting any easier.

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It was near midnight and Jess knew he should have been sleeping but that was impossible. He hadn't drawn since he drew the picture of Leslie all grown up a few years ago but suddenly it was all he wanted to do.

There he sat in the dim light of his childhood night light drawing. He drew Leslie as she had been when he had dreamt about her earlier that day, still ten years old. But next to her, he drew Macy.

He was surprised that his talent hadn't wavered any from not drawing for so long yet the images looked as realistic as they had been before. Jess was pleased with himself. Both girls sat on the steps to their house but Macy stood out more, almost like Leslie was a ghost forever unnoticed by anyone but Jess as she stood behind Macy.

Jess smiled at the two girls as they smiled back up at him yet decided against hanging the picture up. Everyone knew he wasn't totally over Leslie and probably never would, but this would seem like regression mixed with insanity.

Was he the only one who noticed the freakish similarity between the two girls? May Bell hadn't reacted to her but she had been distracted by his apparently lateness… Then she was also in the back of the truck the whole time. Hopefully tomorrow May Bell would pay more attention, she was his little curious sister after all.

It was now near one in the morning and yet Jess couldn't sleep a wink. This was getting annoying. He placed the picture in a folder and gently put it in his bookshelf where he was sure no one would look.

After standing the dark room for a few minutes he finally made his mind up. He'd visit Terabithia. It was always easier to think there anyway.

Even if he didn't still see the creatures he and Leslie had seen all those years ago it still helped to go there. Mentally she was still there and that's all that mattered. He had long forgotten about the little beasts and creatures they had invented to protect themselves from the Dark Master. But Jess knew he was still there…

He wasn't just there either. He had followed Jess his whole life, a constant reminder of who he failed. There wasn't a day the Dark Master had left Jess alone and Jess knew he'd never be alone again.

So as quietly as possible, Jess made his way down the stairs and out the door. This was a system to him by now. He knew which floor boards creaked, how far he could open the door before it would squeal. He knew the way to his kingdom.

Before he realized though, he was standing outside Macy's house blankly looking up at Leslie's old room. He was so close, closer than this after noon. Jess realized they only way he would ever even be any kind of friend to Macy was to over come his fear of that house.

There Jess continued to stand making baby steps closer and closer until he was standing at the foot of the steps sobbing. He was glad Macy wasn't there, he would have scared her more than he did that afternoon. Slowly he started collecting himself.

Then he started laughing. And he knew he'd finally lost it.

" Its been what? Seven years now and here I am sobbing just like back then if not worse." He sat on the steps and lowered his rant to a whisper. " Why didn't I do this when the house was empty? Why did I have to pick when there are people living here?"

Jess leaned back and ran his fingers through his hair only to look up into the highly confused eyes of Macy Summers.

"Jess? What are you doing on my porch?" Jess just about feel on his face he jumped so suddenly.

"I was out for a walk…" He couldn't think of anything better to say. Nothing else made sense anyway. _I was having an emotional break down on your steps because my dead love used to live here. Oh and you look like her. Exactly like her. SURPRISE!_

Jess shook his head but Macy must have been tired enough to buy it. "Oh, well its really late. Are you alright?"

She took a step towards him and could notice something she didn't see before. In the moon light his face was glittering with tears. "Is there something you want to tell me Jess Aarons?"

He couldn't really tell why but he liked the way she said his whole name and for some reason even with tears all over his face, he felt at peace. He wouldn't tell her everything, only some things. Few select things so she didn't run away screaming.

"Yeah, actually Macy there is…" He sat on the steps and motioned for her to follow. She did so without hesitation. "You see, a long time ago my best friend used to live in this house…"

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**Okay the story is NOT over. I have more in my darling little mind… This is just the end of the chapter lol. Okay, review would be loved very very much and help me write because it show I'm loved even a widdle! Alright I'll stop talking now lol… Until next time my dears.**


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